Hangover reference aside, this is not a good thing.
You know that feeling you get when you just KNOW one of those obnoxious, depressive funks is heading your way? Yeah, that’s me today. I am not ok with this.
Sure, it’s nice(?) to have the heads up, but good god this is annoying. There is NO REASON for a funk. None. I mean, shit, things have been going well in nearly all aspects of life.
Work’s busy and a bit stressful, but not to where I can’t handle it (yet). I’m signing another lease on my apartment which means no moving this year either. I found some things out Saturday morning that have made me beyond happy to the point where I can’t really think about it without grinning like a damned imbecile.
So what the fuck is wrong with me? I have so much to do at work, yet my motivation has completely disappeared. I am actually sleeping more through the night, yet I’m always tired. I have plans with fantastic friends for multiple upcoming weekends (beer pong at Ali’s , running with JD, out dancing for our girl Domma’s birthday), and while I’m excited for all these things, right here, right now, I’m down.
Tiny things are swirling through my brain at rapid pace, inconsequential thoughts are taking me over and are growing into big things, things that are threatening to be REALLY BIG THINGS.
They will not be really big things. I can’t let them. I guess the anxious feeling that precedes these funks is a flag waving in the distance yelling at me to snap out of it, do something to distract myself, LIFT MORE, hell, drink more Jameson.
I feel like I’m on a downward escalator, but just realized it was downward and am trying to climb back up to the top before I get to the bottom.
Dammit, that KID is on the ESCALATOR AGAIN!!!
You need an evening with a close friend just talking about EVERYTHING. That's my only saving grace when a sneaky hate spiral is around the corner.
http://bumuterus.blogspot.com/2012/01/stuff-my-shrink-says.htmlBU is one of my good blog friends (who just found out she is accidentally pregnant with #3. oops)… but she just did a great post on anxiety vs. depression and how one can affect / lead to the other. Maybe check it out. Hang in there girlie, and focus on the positives. What the hell happened last Saturday?!
@Heather Goddamn sneaky hate spiral. But good call. My brain twin is so smart.@Josey I'll check it out. 🙂